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Best Of The Worst: Uber Stories That Make You Cringe, Cry, Laugh

The horrifying thing about Uber is… the exact same thing.

The horrifying thing about Uber is… the exact same thing.

We could make anecdotal references to hundreds of stories we’ve heard (and you probably have some bizarre stories too), but for now, we’ve sifted through our four favorite newsworthy stories about Uber drivers that will make you think, “Hey, maybe I should just drive myself.”

Oklahoma is a nice city, also home to teens who robbed a bank and called Uber for a getaway vehicle. Not only is this true, it happened in February 19, 2019 and as you can imagine…didn’t work out the way the criminals had hoped. Thankfully the Uber driver showed up on scene, saw there were police cars everywhere and realized “Oh, no – the robbers wanted me to help them getaway.” Before they could get into the car, they were arrested. Who knew an app. Would lead to such crap.

Virginia is for lovers, but also for black out drunks. Which is exactly what happened to Uber customer Kenny Bachman. He was so drunk, he requested an Uber driver take him home… to New Jersey. Which is 300 miles away. And also costs $1,600 to get there via Uber. Turns out he really did have to pay the fare – and extra charges for all of the tolls along the way. Next time you’re black out drunk, maybe it’s better to just pass out where you are – well, at least it’s cheaper.

Oh, no. Virginia again. This time, Eboni Jones was doing her thing – and by “thing” we mean “shoplifting at Walmart.” A great idea struck her – “Hey, why not get an Uber to be my getaway car.” Not a great idea for several reasons – the first being: Walmart security say her schedule the Uber and get in the car. This made it super easy for cops to track down the vehicle and arrest her. Note to readers – if you’re going to shoplift, maybe next time get a cab.

Uber is nothing if not convenient… especially if you are David Walker of Connecticut. The Uber driver found a purse was left in his backseat and thought “Hey, I should use the credit card in the purse to buy Viagra.” What a stand-up individual. He really got excited about this. Unfortunately it was a terrible idea. He was arrested and charged with theft, which cost him $5,000 in court costs. Talk about a tease.

Next time you need an Uber, remember: It’s normal people doing the drive – and they could be super sketchy. Remember your purse, don’t call when you’re shoplifting – and most certainly, don’t pass out drunk.

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